“I promise, there will never be a time [when they’re so tight that] you can see my balls through my jeans.”
—Me, talking about hipster fashion on New Year’s Eve.
January 2008
93 posts
December 2007
34 posts
“IE team, if you are reading [this]: I hate you so much for IE6.”
—XOPL, in a comment at Boing Boing
- Kevin Pang: I've been blurbed many times, mostly for my "This Falafel is Fanomenal!" -- Kevin Pang, Chicago Tribune, et cetera
- Kevin Pang: And stuck on middle eastern restaurant windows in sketchy parts of town.
- Me: Nice.
- Kevin Pang: By the way, my favorite blurb was about the seafood restaurant... "This Seafood Spot is Shrimply Delicious!"
- Kevin Pang: A low point.
- Me: Haha, indeed.
- Me: Hopefully it will be the only thing you're remembered for some day.
- Kevin Pang: Yes. Puns about crustaceans. "Hot Diggity Clam! This Chowder is Awesome!"
- Me: Hot diggity clam... you didn't actually write that, did you?
- Kevin Pang: I will now.
- Several minutes later:
- Kevin Pang: Actually, now that I think about it, a clam is technically a mollusk.
- Kevin Pang: But, eh.
Sonic Boom
The only benefit I can find that the PS3 has over the Xbox 360 is that it runs nearly silent. After the first time I tested the PS3, when I went back to the Xbox its annoyingly loud fans and drive were even more annoying.
Then, last night, during Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom, the PS3’s fans kicked on and OH DEAR GOD. It was at least three times as noisy as the Xbox has ever been. And I wasn’t playing a game. I was watching a movie.
It sounded like someone turned on a wind tunnel in the living room.
“People said, ‘Does it bother you that girls want to sleep with you because you’re famous?’ ‘That’s a tough one. Lemme think about that. No.’”
—Michael J. Fox in Esquire
Lego Advertisements →
thefwa.com
Nearly perfectly encapsulates the ideas behind Lego… that your imagination is a better toy than the blocks themselves. Or something like that. Did I just write that? Jesus.
Apple and Oranges →
defectiveyeti.com
“Being married to a professional botanist has its ups and downs. It’s nice on day hikes, for instance, having someone around who can instantly identify every plant we see. On the other hand, I don’t need to be notified of every ecological incongruence in the films we watch.”
Items I buy nearly every time I go to Trader Joe’s, even though I probably shouldn’t be buying them because I really don’t need to be and they’re not the best things for me, but they taste so damned good I can’t help myself:
- Milk Chocolate Mini Pretzels
- English Soft Peppermints
- Turkey Chili (canned)
- Giant Cashews (lightly salted)
- Frosted Shredded Bite-sized Wheats cereal
- Me: Seems a little silly for your link of the year to be iPhone. I'm just glad your second link didn't have anything to do with--oh, wait.
- Brian Fling: Haha, jerk. Come on, it's the biggest thing to happen this year.
- Me: I agree, it's just the most obvious pick.
- Me: I was hoping you'd chose something about bum fighting or something.
- Me: Just to buck the trend.
Newspaper Catches Crook By Mistake →
veryshortlist.com
They run two photos—one of a man painting a window, the next of a man stealing a wallet. Turns out, um, they’re the same man.
- Shawn: I know that your priority is trumping me. I wonder what the most lopsided gift exchange in history was?
- Me: It would be awesome if I did actually get you a car. And I just handed you the keys like in one of those Jaguar commercials.
- Me: And then you're holding yesterday's newspaper and you give it to me reluctantly.
- Shawn: Wait, who told you what I got you???
- Shawn: Actually, it's a fish wrapped in yesterday's newspaper. A fresh fish.
- Shawn: Well, freshly found.
Play
My Amazon Wishlist →
amazon.com
Holiday deal going on right now… for every one gift someone buys me, I receive one gift.
“Please do not look at other passengers’ baggage.”
—Las Vegas airport announcement (via bling)
MRTV iPhone Ringer →
maniacalrage.net
Based on the intro from MRTV, here’s a ringer for all you iPhone users. Just add it to iTunes and you’re golden. Now you can take the sounds of Maniacal Rage TV with you every day.
Last night I went to see I Am Legend with Shawn and Evan. The movie was good and I recommend it. But we saw it at the Union Square theatre, which is becoming a terrible place to see movies.
About five minutes in, this fat woman with an insane head of hair walked in and started looking for a seat. I’ll never understand why people in NYC feel they can show up after the movie starts and get a seat. And they look pissed off when they can’t. We have to show up 45 minutes early to get good seats, so do you, fuckface. So she’s walking around talking to herself and her friend who she’s dragging along. And she’s not whispering, she’s talking. Out loud.
Finally she sits in the front row. About two minutes later, she gets up and walks out. Then she comes back and starts muttering and bitching and moaning. And then, of course, she asks people to move. People who got to the theatre 30 minutes before her, who didn’t even get good seats themselves, she asks them all to move over. And then she starts yelling at them.
Of course, people start shooshing her and shouting, “Shut up!” but she just keeps on talking loudly and bitching. And then she starts yelling back at people to shut up about her shutting up.
Remember when they used to send a youngster through the theatre with a flashlight just after the movie started? He would look around for jerks like this fat woman or anyone else who was gonna cause a problem and kick them out. Why did that system break down?
Play
The Bible According To Google Earth →
creativereview.co.uk
Amazing art based on the idea of what certain biblical events would have looked from god’s point of view, which in this case is basically Google Earth’s view. So yes, Google Earth is a modern incarnation of god.
Now, I’m not a religious person so I don’t know the details, but I imagine god probably had zoom-in vision? Couldn’t he have looked a little closer if he wanted?
