2008

Untitled (via darlingseas) HBW, you jerks.

“To love is to suffer. To avoid suffering, one must not love....”
— Woody Allen

Real models (via kennymatic) I love good tilt-shift...

I woke up to a nice surprise this morning—Ben Gold whipped up a nice little iPhone-optimized...

I felt like an ass for waiting in line for 8 hours on iPhone 3G launch day, getting a sunburn and...

Rain, rain, go away, I want to do some Sunrise photos (via...

Listen

“Dark Knight is so good it’s painful. The world just drips...”
— Shawn Morrison, regarding The...

An Email From My Sister

My Dearest Brother, I am writing to inform you that my life as a “free bird” will be...

When the first iPhone came out, for many weeks afterward I was constantly asked on the subway,...

It all makes sense now. I like gory movies (I don’t...

2.0: Day One (via garrettmurray) The apps I’ve bought...

Shawn Morrison: Can you take care of my goat while I'm away?
Me: Where are you going? And what does it eat?
Shawn Morrison: Garbage, just like the children's stories.
Shawn Morrison: Any garbage.
Shawn Morrison: Actually I'm not going anywhere, just trying to get rid of this damn goat.
Shawn Morrison: What a bad purchase that was.
Me: Yeah, well, don't try to pan him off on me.
Me: Wait... pan?
Me: Is that right?
Shawn Morrison: No.
Shawn Morrison: Pawn.
Me: Pawn.
Me: haha
Me: STOP PANNING THINGS ON ME, SHAWN.
Shawn Morrison: Also, the goat farts a lot.
Shawn Morrison: I think it's sick.
Shawn Morrison: Yours for only $5.
Shawn Morrison: You won't see goat prices like this anywhere else.
Me: What about at the goat market in red hook?
Shawn Morrison: You'd be surprised how hard it is to sell a farting goat.
Me: Actually, I wouldn't.

You’re walking down the street and a woman is heading toward you and she’s walking her...

“Ugh, my neck is one gargantuan monkey fist.”
— John O’ Hurley as J....

Vika (via Federico Erra) Love that streak of light working...

Ashley Murray: I'm going to a New Kids on the Block concert! I called you last night to see if you wanted me to get you a ticket, but you didn't answer...
Me: Holy crap that's insane. I wouldn't be caught dead there. You're nuts!
Ashley Murray: I'm nuts like a fox!

Reminder: Today is the last day to save 20% on shirts from Design By Humans by using...

Sean Madden: Dude, why are you so heavy in the left channel in your review?
Me: Because I was holding the camera in my right hand and not being careful about being centered and because my apartment is sinking into the ground on the left side and I think partly I should be blaming global warming for that but I can't really back it up with evidence and also I only talk out of the left side of my mouth whenever I'm sitting at the coffee table in my living room.
Sean Madden: Breathe.

Currently, I have NOT_FOUND followers.

Christian Tabernacle Church

Sean Madden: I saw WALL-E and for some reason didn't come away as impressed as you did.
Me: That's because you're a douche.
Me: And you don't understand the subtle awesomeness of awesome things.
VERY LONG PAUSE, THEN:
Me: But you enjoyed it, i assume?
Me: (I was sort of hoping for a minute there we would never talk again, ever, and that would just be it. Like that moment at the end of Good Will Hunting when Ben Affleck goes to pick up Matt Damon but he's gone and Ben Affleck is like, "What, where is he? Oh, right, I told him to leave me behind... wait... stare straight forward for a minute and then make a little crooked smile and then get in your jalopy... wait for it... PERFECT!")
VERY LONG PAUSE, THEN:
Me: Will?
Sean Madden: Fuck you. How do you like them apples?

sploosh (via _rebekka) Great color and captured action....

Design By Humans is having a “Friend-a-thon” contest, so you can save 20% by entering...

It’s hard to describe exactly why WALL-E is such a...

“I had a seizure? I don’t remember having a seizure....”
— Woman walking down my street,...

“I don’t want to eat shellac and latex paint. I can mix...”
— My mom, after hearing a...

marco: I’m one of the 24 million Wii owners. I’ve been massively disappointed in the pathetic,...

“Democracy demands that the religiously motivated translate...”
— Barack Obama (via marco)

Underpass (via hartlandmartin)

Tip: Avoid a Stupid IE7 getElementById Error Internet Explorer 7 will error and stop...

Sean Madden: I should just turn in my keyboard and go open a yogurt stand.
Me: You should.
Sean Madden: Would you buy yogurt from me?
Me: Maybe... which flavors?
Sean Madden: The standard ones. Almond, salt and vinegar, paprika, and peppercorn.
Me: Man, I could really go for some peppercorn yogurt right now.
Sean Madden: I'm telling you, that one would sell.
Sean Madden: Like hotcakes.
Sean Madden: But it would compete with our hotcake flavor.

“Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you...”
— George Carlin (via torrez)

Exits: Stewart Butterfield's bizarre...

Remember this shit? Do you think that woman killed herself...

Here’s to being… (via someecards.com) For some...

Shawn: So one of my biggest pet peeves with the iPhone is that the silent switch doesn’t...

An Email From My Sister

Dear Brother, Thank you for your recent correspondence. I enjoyed reading your exciting news about...

An Email to My Sister

Dear Sister, I received your email with the subject, “Tuxes” this afternoon. I enjoyed...

Ciudad by obstinato (via heather-rivers)

I was traveling when the tomatoes/salmonella story broke, and I didn’t hear about it until...

I just got an email from Dreamhost telling me I have five special invitation codes I can give out....

Shawn Morrison: Also, I always forget which one it is:
Shawn Morrison: Take a crap in your bed while you're gone, or don't?
Me: Let's go with don't this time.
Shawn Morrison: Right, right, got it.
Shawn Morrison: Last time I got confused.
Me: Yeah, I remember that quite vividly.
Shawn Morrison: Especially since it happened beneath the covers.
Me: Yeah, thanks for that, by the way.
Shawn Morrison: I know you like mysteries.
Shawn Morrison: And discovering things.

“I was wondering if there is any danger in eating too many...”
— “bobbleArtist” in...

I saw my first fight on the subway yesterday. I was waiting at my local stop at about 9:30AM, which,...

Dressed (via garrettmurray) Before the wedding last...

How To Tell You Have a Problem (via garrettmurray) Yikes. I...

Me: Are you <email>@kindle.com?
Shawn Morrison: Yep. Don't send me any of your fan ficiton though.
Shawn Morrison: Especially the Gilligan's Island crap.
Me: YOU SAID YOU LIKED THOSE STORIES.
Shawn Morrison: It's just so obvious that Gilligan is YOU and the professor is ME. It's just getting awkward.
Me: Whatever.
Me: At least I made you the professor.
Me: He's SMART.
Me: IT WAS A COMPLIMENT.

Obama finally secures the nomination. Good for him and us. Even better for us? It not being Clinton....

Sean Madden: How would you feel if you saw an animatronic ventriloquist?
Me: You mean a robot talking through his closed mouth to make it appear as though the smaller robot on his lap was talking?
Sean Madden: Yeah.
Me: Nervous.

sixpence (via Lá caitlin) Lovely colors and motion. I...

hugehuge: Recumbent 3 a.m. conversation a few days ago: She [sincerely and without warning]: I’m...

“They look like psychos? Is that what they looked like? They...”
— George Clooney as Seth Gecko...

Gee whiz, Mr. President. (via creativejuice)

“That way, you know, when an investor says, ‘Do this...”
— Brian Fling, on putting...

“When my mother was pregnant with me, they did an ultrasound...”
— Dwight Schrute (via tgumbel)

Looking Back Again (via garrettmurray) Shannon and Ryan...

Dan is Better than Me (via garrettmurray) In reference to...

Shawn Morrison: Also that's pretty complimentary that people are just lumping you and Dan Cederholm together.
Shawn Morrison: I mean, that guy is WAY better than you.
Shawn Morrison: In every way.
Me: Definitely.
Shawn Morrison: Better looking, better designer, he's made children...
Me: I'm getting a free ride on the undeservingly awesome train.

Just Another Letter From Cyndi (via garrettmurray) The...

Today I happened to be walking in the door as the mailman was opening the building’s mailboxes...

Hong Kong in motion (via c.zwerg)

Last night I stopped at the little deli near my place to grab some milk and just as I was paying I...

2008-2009 TV Season Announced

For the first time in my life, I bought Office. Never once, going back to my first computer in 1990,...

Who Are You? Justin at Left-Handed Toons is a really funny...

It’s official. I am 27.

“Why don’t you stop trying to park like a stupid old...”
— Someone on my street yelling...

Not a good time for photo, I rather have coffee first (via...

This morning NPR described Clinton’s supporting base as “undereducated, blue-collar,...

It took forever to paint my living room. I have an alcove kitchen, so I had to paint above the...

The Nose (via garrettmurray) A shot of my new Rabbit. My...

Do you think when car salespeople are younger they yearn for the day when they can finally get that...

Dash & Blast (via DNSNFR) I’m tempted to say...

I went to Chicago this week and spoke with Brian for six and a half hours about iPhone and mobile...

“At one point, I saw a woman stopped at a light, looking in...”
— IGN: Grand Theft Auto IV...

TTV (via creativejuice)

“The thickness really coats the crud of the bowl, and makes...”
— What I thought I heard the...

extraview: Garrett Murray

“And lastly could you record yourself saying, ‘I have a...”
— Shawn, requesting some useful...

Introducing the Qwick Reviews Podcast

My favorite part of last night’s LOST episode was the moment when, in classic television...

“Crazy people never understand the extent of their insanity....”
— My sister in an SMS message

After I wrote about a recent Fresh Direct onion/grape mishap, someone from Fresh Direct emailed me....

flight 876 to burbank (via blimpa) “did not crash...